The Lie of Self-Love We’re Still Believing

The difference between real LOVE and approval

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For a long time, I thought I was being kind.

I’d let things slide. I’d keep the peace. I’d swallow my discomfort so no one else would have to feel it.

It felt like Self-Love. But it wasn’t.

Because underneath it all was a pattern. A deep one.

I wasn’t setting boundaries.
I wasn’t honoring my truth.
I wasn’t choosing myself.

And that wasn’t Love.

I see this in the leaders I work with all the time.
The ones with huge hearts and powerful missions.
The ones who carry a lot and don’t want to be a burden.

They’re the ones who bend, shrink, or go silent to avoid rocking the boat.
And the world praises them for being “kind” or “selfless.”

But the truth is: real kindness isn’t about self-erasure.

It’s about alignment.

And sometimes?
The kindest thing you can do is say no.
Draw the line.
Walk away.